Britney

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I’ve been reading about Britney Spears, and how she was so changed by her bad relationships, and it’s transfixed me and puzzled me. 

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I was reminded by some photographs she did by Ellen Von Unwerth, of Sugar from “Some Like It Hot,” a signature role of the film star Marilyn Monroe; that of the 1920s ukelele-playing lounge performer.

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Like Sugar, and like Monroe too, Britney is at once strong and fragile at the same time. Both women are painfully shy, sensitive, creative and perfectionistic, in the middle of a circus, in the center of the ring, with lions wanting to take advantage of them.image Her falls from grace, after the two big first loves of her life (namely Justin Timberlake and Kevin Federline) interested me because of how rare that scenario is (girl loses boy) and of strong women coming back after heartbreak. For me, it’s captivating to see the comeback story.

One worry concerning Britney were the suicide attempts, which parallels speculation surrounding Monroe’s death (which I have come to believe was accidental after much reading over the years, although there are those theorists that believe she was a spy and the mob killed her). I’m digressing but after reading and watching a lot about Marilyn Monroe’s life and career, especially those interviews with close friends like Mrs. Greene and another lady I forget the name of, if Monroe had just kicked her sleeping pill habit, she’d have continued to dazzle and entertain us. 

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In her documentary “For the Record,” on Justin Timberlake she said:

“With Justin, he was part of the magnitude of what I had become. So when he was gone I was like, What am I supposed to do with myself? Do you know what I mean? I was so young, I didn’t know… and I was really famous. I would go out just to keep my mind busy, just to keep going, you know what I mean? So I became like a goer, a really busy girl, a party girl.I was devastated [by the breakup] but I handled it a lot better than the [split] with Kevin….He started to do an album for himself and he started to do things for himself, and I just never saw him anymore….When it ended I felt so alone. I didn’t really wanna think about the reality of it. I never faced it….I just ran.”

It’s surprising that she handled her breakup with Justin better than her divorce from Kevin Federline. She confesses she married Kevin Federline for all the wrong reasons. Even with Jason Tradwick, she has stated for the record that he wasn’t the hardest breakup. 

There are less than a handful of interviews where we see Britney cry. About Justin, she cried accidentally in front of Diane Sawyer on ABC in 2002. However, consistently, she has always seemed like she forgot Justin, that she was over it, or that she didn’t want him back. I don’t mean to digress again, but people have speculated that the reason Justin Timberlake and her never got back together was because they were each other’s first love, and because the “whatever you call it” happened, because they were no longer immaculate in each other’s eyes, they could never get passed it and so they never saw or spoke to each other again. 

Dolce, on 05 Jan 2014 – 06:29 AM, said:

If only Justin hadn’t sold her out with CMAR out of bitterness, they totally would’ve gotten back together :crying1: 

I honestly believe that deep down he hates himself for doing that, and he hates her for not taking him back. And all that anger and bitterness just kind of manifested into the douche he is today. 

They broke up in 2002, and the consensus has been that Justin accused Britney of cheating, and Britney didn’t say anything unkind about Justin, whereas Justin has used her likeness in songs, and ultimately broke out as a star after they broke up, using the association with her as fuel to get him noticed and to kick start his career.

In the documentary “For the Record” she reveals how her character is not one to tell as she candidly talks about that period in her life when she was about to divorce Kevin federline and shave her head. “”Like I was going through so much artificial stuff with my kids and Kevin and all that stuff at that time. And he just left me and I was devastated, you know. And people thought that it was me, like, going crazy and stuff like that but people shave their heads all the time, you know. I mean, I was going through a lot but it was just kind of like me feeling a form of a little bit of rebellion or feeling free or, you know, shedding stuff that happened, you know.”

The interviewer asks her “why did you not tell anyone that’s what you were doing? Why did you not tell anyone that’s what you were doing?” her answer, “I don’t think it was anyone’s business really.”

That says a lot.

I read somewhere that Justin wasn’t good or at tentative lover/boyfriend. I found it telling in an interview with Rolling Stone in 2003, promoting her 4th studio album “In the Zone” she explained why this album was more sexual: "I think this record is where I’m at right now in my life. It’s sensual, it’s sexual.” She laughs. “I’m probably writing about that subconsciously because I don’t have that right now.”

In his new autobiography, ‘Out of Sync’, Lance indicates that Justin Timberlake never fully committed to Britney Spears (who he dated between 1998 and 2002) because he was only interested in being a pop star. Bass writes: “Britney showed no signs of the turmoil she would eventually encounter, maybe because she was so in love with Justin she thought it was going to last forever. ——I knew it wouldn’t. Justin already had a great love in his life – his career. He wanted to be a star and no girl, no matter how great, was going to be able to distract him from that for more than a night or two between trips to the centre of the spotlight.” Lance also says Britney was a “perfect girlfriend” #1 

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Image (2001, before American Music Awards)

Read these fan responses:

cheercutie3333: ”She was just as committed to her career as Justin was.  It was her number 1 priority and nothing got in her way at that point either.  ” #25

Certainly Not Dcutie: Obviously, but no one has ever said that Britney couldn’t handle both. #29

How hard is that, to realize that the one you thought you could love forever, who you gave all your effort and love to, actually sells you out and took you for granted, or never loved you? That it was all for nothing, that you potentially were taken advantage of?

According to @iTweetFacts: “Psychologically, happiness is often the unexpected & can be scary which is why people sometimes hold on to bad relationships.” I think Britney wanted a fairy tale love story, and Justin made her laugh, you read that a lot in articles, that he made her laugh, that with him she was her most stable, happy, and alive; that after the breakup her light went out. If only someone had told her, what Tony Curtis said to Marilyn Monroe’s character ‘Sugar’ in “Some Like It Hot”…”No guy’s worth it [i.e. crying over].” 

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One site with a lot of content on young Britney during and just after the Justin era brings interesting quotes pulled from various interviews (source: http://alwaysbritney.livejournal.com):

*”the most painful thing I have ever experienced was that break-up”. 

*”We were together so long and I had this vision. You think you’re going to spend the rest of your life together. Where I come from, the woman is the homemaker, and that’s how I was brought up – you cook for your kids.” ”I didn’t think he was going to go on Barbara Walters and sell me out.” 

*At 21-years old singer says, “I’ve only slept with one person in my whole life. It was two years into my relationship with Justin and I thought he was the one. But I was wrong. 

*BRITNEY says her four-year relationship with pin-up Justin ended because of their pressurised careers, despite rumours he dumped her because she cheated on him.

She says: “I was completely heartbroken. It was like, ‘What do I do now?’ It was the hardest thing I’ve had to deal with.

“It took me months to get over it. I finally realised it was over when I’d hear him sing on the radio or hear people say his name and my heart wouldn’t start fluttering.

“I’ll always love him, he’s my first love.

“And there are certain things I still miss about him. He totally made me laugh.”

But Britney says she will not get back with Justin, because their relationship could never be the same again.

*Rumours that she cheated on Justin are not accurate, apparently she made out with Wade Robinson who was her choreographer, but nothing else. It was because she heard Justin cheated on her, and she was mad, and wanted to make him jealous but not to go so far as to sleep and cheat cheat on him. (source: http://m.reveal.co.uk/showbiz-celeb-gossip/news/a525170/britney-spears-split-from-fiance-jason-trawick-was-hard.html)

*”It was a hard break-up. It wasn’t one of my hardest break-ups but I definitely had some things to say in my album about it.”

One of her early song was called “From the Bottom of my Broken Heart”, and I found this quote that really illuminates why this break-up with Justin made such an impact: “A broken heart is what changes people.”-unknown source. Isn’t it funny how art imitates life? We see Britney’s songs and albums reflect her stages as a person, her feelings, her interests, what’s influencing her, and sometimes what’s eating her.

When the breakup happened Britney did cry a few times, Justin seemed sad and holding back in his interview with Barbara Walters promoting his first solo album Justified (which the object of affection in each of its songs were referencing Britney), but he has always been the bad-mouther, using double-entendres, or saying it’s not about her, but it so clearly hints at the history of Britney, like what he said about “What Goes Around”, which he said was inspired by a friend or dancer who had that experience (of being cheated on). Justin is the one who seems to have not gotten over it, and yet he seems to have grown the most, matured the most, achieved the career alcolades that have eluded Britney (although Britney did win a Grammy for best dance recording in 2003). He is even married, and only once, to Jessica Biel, but it is rumored that they have an “open marriage” or some kind of arrangement, or that Jessica didn’t know what she was getting into (that he is more involved in himself and his career. Whatever the case, Britney looks like the less mature one, but did she ever say an unkind word about Justin? Maybe the theory that the media fueled the bad blood contributed to it. Maybe they gave Justin the idea that she cheated. Maybe we’ll never know. But he didn’t have the character to be a gentleman and not speak about it or try to make Britney look bad.

In that same Rolling Stone interview from 2003, Britney’s response to the question about how she felt about the song “Cry Me A River” being written about her, she said: “I think guys have egos, and when their egos get hurt and their pride’s messed up, they deal in weird ways. And, um, I don’t know, man. I really don’t know. It’s made me really weary of guys, I’ll put it that way.”

Further pressed in the interview:

“Did you call him up or say anything to him?

"Well, actually, [laughs] he called [laughs]. I’m gonna break it down right now, OK? You want the scoop, you want the truth? Here it is. He called me up and asked me if it was OK. I can’t believe I’m telling you this right now. But who cares. He called me up and wanted to supposedly get back together or whatever, but behind it was, “And by the way, you’re in a video that’s coming out.” That kind of got slipped in. “Don’t worry about it. It’s not a big deal.” So the record label called and said, “If you want to change this, you can.” I had the power to say no to the video. But I didn’t, because I thought, “Hey, it’s your video.”

Had you seen it?

I hadn’t seen it. Then it came out, and I said, “I should’ve freakin’ said no to this shit!” I was so like, "Whoa. What is going on right now?” But, hey. And I said, “Why did you do this?” He goes, ‘Well, I got a controversial video.” And I was like, “You did. [Claps her hands, as if for a dog that just performed a trick.] Yay for you.” So he got what he wanted. [Clears throat] I think it looks like such a desperate attempt, personally. But that was a great way to sell the record. He’s smart [laughs]. Smart guy.”“

Although portrayed as the reason for the breakup, the bad guy so to speak, Britney has never said anything attacking, whether direct or indirect. You hear in performances, Justin milking that history, using that catch phrase Britney made famous “Britney Bitch” and saying the word Bitch in a song, knowing people will interpret that as referencing Britney. 

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Weireder yet, I found this quote from Justin, back when they were together: All she has is me. I’m the only one in her life she wants to talk to about stuff. If I have a problem, I have four guys I can talk to, and I can go directly to them. She has to call me on the phone, and it’s hard.” – Justin Timberlake on Britney Spears…if he cared, then why’d he leave. Was she too much? Someone with BPD, yes maybe. But why was Britney so isolated? He makes her sound like she has no friends, or family…are those rumors about he illuminati true, and are her family only all about the money? What is the truth? What’s the big secret?

Later that year, Justin got interviewed by Rolling Stone and he said this: When we were together, it was bliss like something from a damn fairy tale.” 
              –Justin Timberlake, Rolling Stone, January 2003

Britney has not seen Justin in 10 years, but the last time they might have seen each other might have been at the American Music Awards, almost a year after their split. 

Britney and Justin spark rumors of a reconciliation

Issue Number: 
471
Published: 
2003-01-17


LOS ANGELES – Just when the rumors about pop singers Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake reuniting had finally died down, reports from the United States claim the pair are back together – again. Although Spears is rumored to be seeing Limp Bizkit front man Fred Durst and Timberlake has been seen with actress Alyssa Milano, reports allege the former sweethearts are an item again. The U.K.’s Daily Mirror reported the couple, who broke up last spring, enjoyed a passionate make-out session in the lobby of her NY apartment block recently.

And the New York Post’s Page Six reported Wednesday that the pair savored a kiss after the American Music Awards on Monday in Hollywood. “They were kissing and holding hands,” a source told Page Six. “They were definitely together.” Both stars have recently been quoted in interviews saying they still love each other. 

Timberlake was the first to admit he still had feelings for the starlet, telling Rolling Stone: “When we were together it was bliss, like something from a damn fairy tale … I really still do love that girl.” Spears responded in kind to Us Weekly: “I’m very touched that he still loves me. “A part of me will always love him because he was my first love.” The pop stars broke up after three years together amid rumors of infidelity on both parts.

….“Justin was my first real love and I doubt I’ll ever be able to find love like that again.” …

Justin has said of Britney "I’m kind of chilling. I’m waiting to see. I do have to come to the realization that I might never. I still love her. I really do still love that girl.”

He also said he’d nerve say anything to disrespect her,“I love Britney with all my heart and I would never do anything to disrespect her or degrade her.” – Rosie, March 2002

The reason they broke up was never explicit or clearly stated, and yet he tries to say songs or certain sentences said on stage “in character” are not referencing her, that everyone will speculate about everything they do and try to tie it to each other.  “Obviously the feelings of love weren’t as developed as they possibly could be. So I was pretty infatuated with her. It was, uh, looking back on it; it definitely had this great expectations vibes to it. I think so. I think I did give her her first kiss. You know, um, I remember when we decided we were going to go our separate ways. We sat down and I said to her, I said, ‘If there is ever a moment when you ever need me, rest assure I will be there because I love you as a person and I will always love you.’ But I also said, ‘Look, no matter what we say at this point, people are going to speculate things and we, I could get myself in a horrible position if I was to say something and somebody misinterpret because that happens all the time. And I promised her I wouldn’t say specifically why we broke up.” – 20/20, November 2002

I don’t know..Did he really love her? Or was it all talk?

“The way I loved Britney was like nothing ever, so the hardest thing was hearing all this.” 
“Yeah, there is no way we wouldn’t be. Her family has been a part of my family. I also believe – and this is not a prediction – but we are both 20 and 21. Who knows what’s going to happen?” 
“I think Britney is a wonder person and I still love her.” – Seventeen, November 2002

“I feel I became so consumed with her that I didn’t see some things that I should have seen. I don’t feel like I’m saying too much by saying she knows why this happened. Britney’s a fire sign, a Sagittarius, and they do things on a whim. I love her; we have a lot of history, and she’s the closest anybody ever got to me.” 

“I can’t honestly say I’ve gotten used to it ‘cause the nights are crazy. I’ve cried myself to sleep looking at the ceiling, missing what we had.”Vibe, February 2003

My question was, what’s the reason? Did she kiss Wade Robson, is it that she has BPD? What was the reason?

I don’t know, but I think Justin pushed things too far, lied too much, and probably was using her for fame. Or maybe, he abused the relationship, wasn’t there enough as a boyfriend, and he definitely has been slyly backstabbing her in songs and performances, and using the breakup as fuel to make himself relevant, not to say that he isn’t talented but he is crafty, even my mom says there is something about him that seems shady.

Doesn’t it break your heart and fuck with your mind when you read this? 

“She’s just Brit to me. Good answer? Alright, now let me tell you what I really think. No, um, to me she’s just the same twelve year old. She’ll always be that sweet girl I know. And if you got it, do it. And she’s got it. She’s a sexy piece of animal.” 

“I’m definitely in love. I think Britney has been really good for me. Just because we are in the same boat, and we’re the same age, and we have a lot of them same feelings. So it’s nice to talk to somebody the same age as you.” 

“Everyday, every morning when I wake up, I wonder what time it is where she is and what she’s doing, how many more days until I get to see her again. I definitely love her, and I’ll do what it takes. – MTV’s Fake ID Club, November 2001

Actually an episode of the Brady Bunch, where Alice leaves, revealed something that clicked in my head. “Sometimes when you push people to far, you just can’t bring them back again.” – Carol Brady.

Look at this sick post I found. Kind of accurate though. “These two exes who recently started talking again secretly after about 6-7 years of silence, are still playing emotional games with one another. They both have others in their lives, and their successes mirror one another’s, but because the male was hurt by the breakup, he purposely waits weeks in between responding back to her emails and phone calls. Our source says he is either scared or trying to see how much power he has over her. We think it’s just a little silly and immature. We’re not sure what the recent contact is all about for the two, but we hope it means teaming up professionally again. The two could be unstoppable! Reveal: Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake.”(Source: http://www.imnotobsessed.com/blog/2009/07/03/blind-item-answers-justin-timberlake-still-has-feelings-for-britney-spears/)

Britney seemed over the relationship. But as a person, she seemed like there were things going on that she wasn’t over with. Like I said earlier, a family member died, parents divorced, lots of career pressure, maybe not enough real friends, and possibly parents that were too controlling and only caring about the money aspect of her. Maybe she was starved of love, maybe the illuminati made a deal with her, I don’t know. But she felt wronged and explored by people during her dark phase. And I’d be interested to know the real reasons for everything. Because sometimes it seems like she is a prisoner, and that she is under control against her will.

In 2011 Justin married Jessica Biel (the WB’s 90s family hit series “7th Heaven”), and in Vanity Fair he said about Britney: “

Of his arguably most famous ex-girlfriend, Britney Spears, Timberlake tells Grigoriadis, “I wish her the best—that goes without saying. We haven’t spoken in 9 or 10 years.” The former child star says that most of his and Spears’s relationship was based on circumstance, but had no chance for the long term. “We were two birds of the same feather—small-town kids, doing the same thing. But then you become adults, and the way you were as kids doesn’t make any sense. I won’t speak on her, but at least for me, I was a totally different person,” he says. “I just don’t think we were normal; there was nothing normal about our existence. We spent way too much time being the biggest thing for teenyboppers.”

“It was exciting that we were having so much success and we could do whatever we wanted. And I mean that about everybody: Backstreet Boys, ’NSync, Britney, Christina,” Timberlake says of his early years as a pop idol. “At that time, we could literally go, ‘Oh, man, let’s go to Bali,’ and we’d be on a plane to Bali. We were little kids with big toys. You do the math—that’s not going to last.” Some very big toys, indeed, as Timberlake recalls that on the set of The All-New Mickey Mouse Club, “Ryan [Gosling] and I used to steal golf carts and go driving in the middle of the park to get milk shakes, and we never got in trouble for it. We thought we were big shit.”(Source: http://www.vanityfair.com/online/daily/2011/06/justin-timberlake-on-jessica-biel-britney-spears-and-filming-friends-with-benefits)

“at the beginning of her career, she seemed invulnerable. When “…Baby One More Time” was released in 1998, Britney was 16, a nasal-voiced, liplined Lolita in sex-kitten garb. The now-iconic premise for the music video, which featured sexually precocious Catholic schoolgirls gone wild, was developed by Britney herself—and what an off-kilter and subversive concept it was, reconciling the chastity of religious imagery (or style, at least) with startlingly sexual choreography. (The director had presented a treatment for the video involving cartoon characters in a bid to appeal to younger children, and the fact that Britney argued, and stranger still, won, serves as a testament to her preternaturally sharp business acumen.) In the first single from her second album, "Oops! I Did It Again,” orgasmic ululating yielded to a proclamation that seemed, by that point, self-evident: “I’m not that innocent.” (

Britney said this about herself before becoming famous “I wasn’t the valedictorian. I was honor roll—I guess As and Bs. I played basketball, I was the point guard on my basketball team. Um, I wasn’t the most popular girl in school. I just hung out…. I loved English, I loved reading a lot. I loved biology, I thought that was cool.” — Britney Spears

Telling, in a recent interview she said her advice for getting over someone quick: “Get Another Guy Really Quick!” (Source: http://www.eonline.com/news/488494/britney-spears-advice-for-getting-over-a-breakup-get-another-guy-really-quick). 

Goes to show that although she went partying after Justin, and got Kevin afterwards, then went off to party with Paris Hilton, only to ultimately have a breakdown (some of it I almost can’t believe, here is one interpretation of what happened during those black years http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-507788/I-fear-friend-Britney-kill-herself.html, it reveals a lot of the psychological effects of being a celebrity, the paparazzi’s role in her persecution complex and feeling rebellion and going from light to dark) … Britney’s way of getting over things was only building things inside. The change seemed so sudden, like whiplash…

To explain her breakdown, Spears said that she had let the wrong people into her life.

Although I kind of like this idea, putting aside post-natal depression, drugs, alcohol, and possible BPD, maybe “Was it just a really sheltered, not very bright person just reacting to things?” (http://ohnotheydidnt.livejournal.com/35721139.html?thread=5047260339#ixzz2mvvyTGKB)

(“I had totally lost my way. I lost focus. I lost myself”)

“[It was] a really bad time in my life. … I’m not gonna sugarcoat it and say I was OK,” she admitted. “Maybe I had traumatic stress. I just remember I did not want to be at home.” So driving was an escape, music and dance her therapy…the urge to fly, to run, it’s to flee our circumstances. So much like her breakup with Justin, her breakup with Kevin made her feel like she had to run away from things. (http://m.mtv.com/news/article.rbml?id=1600361&weburl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mtv.com%2Fnews%2Farticles%2F1600361%2Fbritney-spears-talks-breakups-breakdowns-record.jhtml&alt=http%3A%2F%2Fm.mtv.com%2Fnews%2Findex.rbml&cid=300)

“I married for the wrong reasons. Instead of following my heart … I just did it for the sake of the idea of everything. It just led me on a weird path. And when it ended I just felt so alone. I didn’t want to really think about the reality of it. It was like, ‘I’m OK. I can do this. It’s gonna be OK.’ I never really faced it. And I just ran.”

She says her marriage disintegrated when Federline began concentrating on his rap career.

So does this mean that she can’t deal when they aren’t there and are focused on their career? I wonder about co-dependency with her, but I can’t believe that about her. 

Although, I couldn’t deny the parallels I saw when reading about another pop culture figure: Edie Sedgwick. In Edie: American Girl (book)

[from the Ciao! Manhattan tapes]: ”It was really sad – Bobby [Neuwirth]’s and my affair. The only true, passionate, and lasting love scene, and I practically ended up in the psychopathic ward. I had really learned about sex from him, making love, loving, giving. It just completely blew my mind – it drove me insane. I was like a sex slave to this man. I could make love for forty-eight hours, forty-eight hours, forty-eight hours, without getting tired. But the minute he left me alone, I felt so empty and lost that I would start popping pills…” (EDIE315)

Rutherford Johnson talks about her, and being obsessed by a person and finding an escape through heroin or drug use on page 316.

We all remember Britney’s curious years, experimenting and partying with the wrong people, being taken advantage of as she has called it in numerous interviews. She partied hard after the breakup with Justin and Kevin. Why? ”The need to escape from emotional pain is the foundation for all addictive behavior. (source: “http://www.everystatecontentment.com/ARTICLES/ArticlesbyRonWilkins/TheNeedtoEscape.aspx)

“Confusing love w/obsession” is a book about something I suspect happened with Britney, it was like music and dance, “ way for her to feel good, and avoid feeling empty, etc. (Book: http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1592853560/ref=redir_mdp_mobile?n=283155&qid=1150241971&redirect=true&ref_=sr_1_7&s=books&sr=1-7&v=glance)

When Britney had her babies, we saw more extreme behavior from her, and when she was taken against her will to a psychiatric ward, it became blear she may be borderline or have a violent case of post-traumatic stress. Nothing has officially been declare. However, it fits the profile of the typical borderline/temperamental/sensitive artistic personality. I started to see how her commitment to two men was on a level that most women would all go crazy after if it didn’t work out. She was making both men her world. In the case of Justin he was apart of that celebrity world, he was apart of what she had become, as she said in her documentary “For The Record” I cited earlier. So it was easy for her to perform and be creative, she was inspired, she was excited, she had a host for her love, a host to give all her love, and she was at the top of her game because she was manic with energy for her love for him, love for her success, and loving the attention. We would all perform optimally with all that positive energy around us. But, where do we draw the line between obsession and dependency? And why would Britney cheat on Justin? Was he unavailable and not at tentative as Lance Bass suggested? Read this: “One of the more obvious theories as to why people with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) have such reckless sex lives is (Source: the fact that they constantly feel emotional emptiness.” http://www.downwardspiralintothevortex.com/2011/07/why-are-borderlines-so-sexual.html?m=1). Around the time of the breakup, Britney’s parents divorced and a family member had died. Maybe all the negativity got to her, and she felt alone, like everything rested on her? She was a child star after all, she supported her family to a large extent, and maybe in a relationship she felt free to be a child, without responsibility, without worry, just light, and easy.
"Britney has always provoked strong feelings.  Her childlike innocence and her adult sexuality have created the perfect controversial mix.—-What effect can this  [Fame] have on a teenage girl’s psycho-sexuality; self-esteem and view of herself in general?” (Source: http://www.mentalhealthy.co.uk/features/celebrity/britney-spears-behind-the-circus.html)
This quote from F. Scott Fitzgerald provided me with one side of the answer: ”in the end, we were all just humans drunk on the idea that love, only love, could heal our brokenness.”
Britney has been called a the princess of pop, but one thing that comes to mind when I think of her is siren. She actually has a song out now on her new album “Britney Jean” called ‘Tik Tik Boom’, and she starts it off like this ” You got a sex siren in your face” referring to herself (or her character). She is like a siren, so many siren songs, yearning for love, trying to entice love, and bleeding from love. She reminds me of Hans Christian Anderson’s Little Mermaid, who dies if she does not find true love.
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“If you cannot make the prince fall so much in love with you that his every thought concerns only you, then, the first morning after he has married another, your heart will break and you will become foam on the ocean.”
Larry Rudolph, her long time manager said back in 2008 to Rolling Stone “she’s a relationship girl.” She has been called an adult child in the court cases about her children’s custody and she under the conservatorship of her father until he dies (her internet and phone use is under restrictions (http://nypost.com/2013/11/30/will-britney-ever-be-in-control-of-her-life/, maybe the lies and the negative things has effected her more than we know, she has said that her dark period felt like PTSD, and words do hurt, so does the stacking and hounding she and other celebrities deal with, she might be really sensitive and therefore needs to be sheltered). She is troubled, and it’s sad to think she needs all this protection, like she can’t handle life.  (Source: http://www.rollingstone.com/music/news/britney-spears-returns-rolling-stones-2008-cover-story-20110322). She is even being protected from seeing negative reviews from her latest album (Britney Jean, which has received reviews that said it had no personality, etc. but die hard fans enjoyed it enough http://perezhilton.com/2013-12-05-britney-spears-people-shielding-her-from-bad-reviews-britney-jean#sthash.nGPljeOj.dpbs).
Maybe she can talk more easily about the breakup with Justin and Kevin more easily as time goes on. Her shyness has been a problem, but she’s more outspoken, that’s getting on the right track. She is dealing better with what she went though, but it was a revelation back in 2012 when old history was drudged up in the court case against former manager “Sam Lufti, that her behavior has a catalyst, a catalyst that she tried to hide and make light of in interviews: Justin Timberlake.
Take this headline: ‘Justin Timberlake is to blame for Britney’s downward spiral’….”According to the lawyer, before they split, Britney was a ‘ray of light,’ but afterwards she became ‘angered and depressed.’” (Source: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2220410/Justin-Timberlake-blame-Britneys-downward-spiral-Breakup-star-left-Spears-depressed-say-defence-lawyers.html)

 dosomethin2nite: It was obviously the breakup with Kevin that caused Britney to start spiraling out of control. Britney admitted this herself in FTR [For the Record]. She specifically said that while she was upset over the JT breakup it was the her divorce from Kevin that really shattered her because she had kids with him & they had built a beautiful home together. Also, look at it logically. Britney handled the JT breakup a lot better than Justin did. She didn’t really talk about it, went on to have a successful VMA performance & album launch and she was bursting with excitement in Chaotic when she talked about her relationship with Kevin. 

Either Britney’s lawyers are dumb for making this irrelevant point or TMZ misquoted them. I thought it was obvious, JT was always the one who was hung up on Britney after their divorce. Throughout the years he has talked about her more than a handful of times & even went as far as to diss her on SNL & at the Madonna tribute thing. Im sure Britney was a lil upset about her breakup with Jt but she always gave the impression that she wasn’t really that phased by it. However, after her divorce is when her life started unraveling. That is when she started partying with Paris Hilton while forgetting to wear underwear. Gosh, I should represent Britney lol. This makes sense since she said in “For the Record”“With Kevin, because I had two children with him, I did not know what to do with myself,” she says. “I had built my dream home in Malibu, a huge house and a pool and a huge yard for the kids and I did everything for them. And just my world was that.”

This fan’s opinion was interesting to read, suggesting that Justin was the one more hung up, that Kevin was a harder breakup to get over. Remember when she said the end of her engagement with Jason Tradwick was easier than pas breakups? Was she referring to Justin or Kevin?

Reading an interview that Uma Thurman gave Oprah in 2005, she gave me an answer: “You bear two children with somebody – that’s not a small thing – and then you can hardly talk to them” (http://www.people.com/people/article/0„1115532,00.html). This explained why for Britney it seemed more excruciating with Kevin than Justin, though still a very deep cut. This explained why Britney seemed so unaffected by the Justin breakup, or why she could fake that it didn’t bother her. Were they too young, and therefore it was more intense a breakup, or was it also that they were so young that they could come back faster? I don’t know but it makes sense why Kevin’s betrayal was the worse of the two men.

I asked my fiancé, to get the male perspective, and he said that “it’s pretty hard to admit that you still care about someone and that they are still a big deal—-especially when there are unresolved things between the two of you, and you are still hurt by them.”

So, Britney is like all of us, learning how to deal with life, and all it throws at us. Some call her a “cypher with boundless depths”, but she has many sides, as this sad Rolling Stone 2008 article details, she could’ve been a tragedy, a Kurt Cobain, a Marilyn Monroe, but instead, she came back. Although she is not at her peak, her story has endeared her as has her work , and the image she leaves in our minds of youth, talent, beauty, and spirit. She may be on mood stabilizers, but how can we judge? We all have demons, blackouts, and things we want to deny or hide, she is in the public eye, and sage continues to serve us something to analyze or be excited about. She is someone in pop culture that although not an inventor, physician, or hero, she is putting herself out there, for money, but we all put ourselves on the line, although her’s is a world stage, she shows us that we can all come back and do it again and again, never completely giving in, always going on and on, working, living, and loving, giving, and taking, “tip’ the world ends.” 

One cruel article said this about her just released album “Britney Jean” made this statement: “But as Britney Jean unfortunately suggests, a solid and successful Spears album isn’t one where fans get “the real Britney.” It’s one where she sounds just human enough and just invested in her work enough to let fans project their fantasies of whatever “the real Britney” is: someone still hungry for creative control and agency, someone whose vocal idiosyncrasies bring out the best in producers, someone who isn’t a total zombie. Britney Jean forces fans to confront the fact that the truth—her truth—is probably a disappointment.” (Source: http://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2013/12/the-inevitable-boringness-of-a-personal-britney-spears-album/281933/).

The thing is, we are all ordinary, and disappointing in some ways…have we all been so lucky to reach our full potentials? Side note, she did have arthroscopic surgery a decade ago, so of course she holds back on stage and isn’t dancing at her peak, maybe her depression took her discipline about dancing, maybe she lacks confidence, she has always been shy, but she is a performer, she puts on a shows, a face, dress, and a sense that we are all like her, trying to figure it out, trying to decipher life, and love ourselves. I read, that you learnt to love yourself when someone shows you, by loving you. I think if her breakups taught her anything, it is the same for us, that life goes on until you say, and that you can find what keeps you going by letting the past go and forgiving yourself. Britney is touted as a Christ figure, “More than any other star today, Britney epitomizes the crucible of fame for the famous: loving it, hating it and never quite being able to stop it from destroying you.” (Source: http://www.rollingstone.com/music/news/the-tragedy-of-britney-spears-rolling-stones-2008-cover-story-20110329#ixzz2mNWOR8X8)

Britney is one story, of a rise and fall, and we all have a story like that…as a young 24 year old woman, getting married for the first time (and hopefully last) next year, I am approaching the same age as Britney when she was going to go crazy. Life I have found to be as hard as my elders told me, and her story is one of many I’ve read, and I’m fascinated because on one hand I wish I could be so loved and celebrated as she, like I have that spark in me to dazzle people, but she also makes me feel good about my life, I guess I wanted to write this to show that we can all be silly enough to be interested in someone’s story, to figure out why they became who they are. “There is beauty in the breakdown,” that line from the famous Frou Frou song makes me think, life is a series of ups and downs. It’s that we came out alive and survived that is admirable, it is that we find love and support to get us through the tough times, it is figuring out that life is about more than us. It is our loved ones that get us through. When you find the one, you are truly blessed, and when you love yourself that’s the best, because then you can really enjoy and make a great life. 

So did Britney learn her lessons? If there’s one thing for sure, is that we never stop learning. Not giving up on ourselves is the hardest lesson to learn. But when you learn it, you win, and nothing can get you down.

In her song “Brightest Morning Star” I think she indicates that she has found some way to cope. Through God, through religion, through her children, and her new found love. It’s not easy going from girl to woman…it’s not easy going from baby to adult…we are all coping and trying to find our way, if she sheds some light on what it means to be human, it’s that we can find our way again, every time we fall.

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As of last night Dec, 22, 2013 a new documentary came out called “I Am Britney Jean” it catches us up on what’s new with Britney, here were some memorable moments.

Britney Spears gave an inside look at her personal and public lives in the two-hour E! documentary I Am Britney Jean,timed to the 32-year-old singer’s two-year Las Vegas show at Planet Hollywood that kicks off Dec. 27.

The doc chronicles the Spears’ four-month journey in preparing for the upcoming Britney: Piece of Me gig, as well as the multitude of personal and professional obligations, like music video shoots, rehearsals and figuring out the flow of the show.

The Hollywood Reporter compiled 12 interesting and revealing moments from I Am Britney Jean.

Spears prefers not to care about what people think anymore. It appears age has helped Spears see things a lot more clearly. “When I first started out, I didn’t care what anybody thought of me. I was happy to be there. I was like, ‘This is great!’ But then 10 years later, I realize there’s a lot of mean things on the Internet,” she said. “But before the naivete in the whole thing was just brilliant because it was like you can’t really control what they think so you can’t really worry about what they think. That attitude is the one to have.”

Spears felt “alienated from the public.” Though she didn’t pinpoint an exact time period, one could probably guess what she was referring to. In the doc, Spears said she felt “alienated from the public” when she couldn’t go out without having 20 paparazzi following her. “But as time passed, they lightened up and they went away, after I wouldn’t come out of the house for two years,” Spears said. “It was a trying time. It was kind of confusing for me. Personally, I’m a shy person and I’m particularly not really made for this industry because I am so shy. It’s not something I deal with so well.”

Spears still struggles with speaking her mind. “I’m not saying it’s good to be a bitch, but a lot of times in this industry it’s better to speak up and say what’s on your mind, which I have a problem with,” she said.

Spears on dealing with pressure. “Pressure is a funny thing. Sometimes I tend to go inward when I’m under pressure,” she said. “I tend to keep it all in. I don’t express myself too much. If I’m really nervous, I’m really quiet. But I think I thrive under pressure.”

Spears shares her motto on love. “Love is just an unexplainable thing and there’s a saying that I have in my bathroom in Louisiana. It says ‘Go beyond reason to love, for it’s the only safety there is.’ And it’s true you should always go beyond reason to love and to be with the person you want to be with and to be cherished and to be treasured. I think it’s why we’re here as people,” she said.

Spears on believing in heaven. During a one-day shoot — which should have been done over two days — for the video content that will be used for the Britney: Piece of Me show, Spears said, “I definitely believe in heaven. I know there is a place beyond our wildest dreams.”

The Vegas residency is a career retrospective. Sure Spears was a member of The Mickey Mouse Club, but it was “…Baby One More Time” in the late ’90s that catapulted her into the mainstream. Her upcoming Vegas show, Britney: Piece of Me, is meant to serve as a 24-song, seven-act career-spanning retrospective covering the past 15 years. Spears says she wants her fans to get “a part of my soul” with the show “because I’m going to put my heart and soul into this.”

Why did Spears agree to a two-year Vegas stint? As Spears said in the doc, it was so there was a sense of stability for her two children. “I figured it’d be a really good place for the children and the family,” she said. “It was kind of like an ideal situation.”

Spears opens up about her boyfriend. The doc saw the entire Spears clan together for Thanksgiving and it was then the usually private singer talked briefly about her current love, David Lucado. “He’s just a simple guy. He’s funny. He’s passionate. He’s just a good guy. He gets what I do so it works out,” Spears said.

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She opens up about anxiety and stress, hinting at bipolar which is pretty brave. http://www.independent.ie/entertainment/britney-spears-opens-up-on-bipolar-disorder-i-turn-into-a-different-person-29861547.html

My favorite was when her litte sister Jamie Lynn said that the ‘No one in the world is harder on my sister than she is on herself,’ she said, naming Britney as ‘her second mama’. – See more at: http://celebraits.com/?p=9353#sthash.WWHc6ScX.dpuf

Public and private Britney are very different, Larry Rudolph her manager has said. But she’s really that southern girl from Louisiana. She really was the girl next door, and that’s really who she is. She’s just a little girl from Kentwood, Louisiana.” We learn more and more about Britney, we understand how she becomes this other person on stage, a powerful performer, but what she does is only one part of herself, her gifts are a prison in some ways, her heart and mine still innocent but bruised…she heals, from what? Too much too soon? Heartache? Mental illness? Does it matter? The world has put too much on her, and it’s time to realize that she is a reflection of our desires and our own sense of trying to figure ourselves our without destroying ourselves and losing ourselves. We are fragile, and from that we can be strong, but we must be careful and lucky if we can to protect us from harm. We’ll never know the truth, except that she was a unique star, one that never capitalized on her pain, one who was private and truly humble.

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